Society seems to condition us to think in a winning/losing pattern. Growing up in Germany I can attest to the (still) dominant believe that “failure is not an option / terrible”.
To this day, when I tell people in Germany that my first startup failed, the common commentary I get is: “Oh — that’s terrible. How did you cope with it?”
Overall this might be the worst possible reaction — as it doesn’t produce any useful insights.
Instead of asking:
- Did you win?
- Did you lose?
- Did you fail?
Focus on the one right question:
What did you learn?