When I was in college I made a living by working at trade shows, running the on-stage entertainment. Trade shows are an extreme environment: You are constantly under fire, you get notoriously too little food & sleep and you mostly make it through the day running on obscene amounts of caffeine.
I loved it.
After coming home from such an adrenaline-fueled couple of days I literally crashed. I went into a dark place — bordering depression. I didn’t get out of bed for days, my mood was crap, I had no energy.
I missed the rush.
For a while I tried to even myself out. Avoid the rush in hopes that I won’t crash. And it worked. But it also left me unfulfilled and bored.
Today I accept this ebb and flow of energy. It’s who I am. It’s what I crave, it’s what makes me happy and fulfilled. And it’s the price I pay — gladly.
Mediocrity is boring and exhausting.